The farm
From Metabods
by WordShop
Contents |
Part 1
In the middle of the California Desert lies a very special private institution. It is in the public eye a location where juvenile offenders can be sent to change their outlook on life and make it far less likely that they will return to illegal activities. Operated by the Scandie Corporation this facility seems to operate in more black areas than one would think possible.
There has never been an escape from "The Farm", and no matter how rough the offenders seem to be upon arrival, quick reversals in personality are the rule of the day.
Officers of the Scandie Corporation call this one of their "experimental facilities", and the data gathered here seems to be channeled right into various government agencies.
The offenders are hand picked, and certain types of offenses are not eligible, and others are actually more desirable as "recruits".
Residents at "The Farm" are called "recruits" initially, and on paper. What they are in reality will be revealed as the chapters of our story unfold. The ages of the "recruits" start as early as twelve and range to seventeen years of age. Several of the recruits have remained at the facility a great deal longer and have become "instructors".
The latest techniques including subliminal programming and sleep-learning are in use for education. This has been quite interesting because at testing the boys are returning higher test scores using sleep and subliminal techniques than students in the conventional educational system.
When these men leave "The Farm" they are most special indeed. They all end up with jobs with "the government".
When each boy arrives at "The Farm" he is required to keep a computerized diary. What you will be reading are the files and diaries of a number of the "recruits". The initial files will introduce each recruit and those then will go to his diary for various parts of the process under which these young men are "groomed" for service to our country.
Subject #1-0965-BA2 G-1
Michael Kilvaney is a 16-year-old white male who was recruited from the Theodore Roosevelt Institute for Boys in Arlington, Texas. He was a repeat offender and had been institutionalized three times starting at age twelve. His offenses included, grand theft auto, assault, battery, illegal use of a firearm, illegal possession of a firearm as a result of probation, possession of drugs for sale, and possession of drug manufacturing chemicals. Used e-mail for drug sales and is quasi computer literate.
In Michael's medical examination many abnormalities were noted. In spite of an exaggerated attitude his body lacked any type of muscle tone which should be present in a 16-year-old male. His body appeared to be that of a male four or five years younger. Sexual development also appears retarded with penis and testicular size under established norms. Facial, pubic and other hair growth was also sparse and not typical of a male of this age group. Blood chemistry testing was not conclusive, the only abnormality found was that levels of Testosterone and Growth Hormone were in the bottom ten percentile range for normal males in this age group.
Age: 16 , Height, 5'1", Weight 96, Waist 26, Chest 29, Biceps 9, penis 2.7 flaccid 3.9 erect. Sexual orientation is unsure. Subject claims heterosexuality in such a manner as to make this Doctor question his claims. Subject admits engaging in mutual masturbation and subject went into details of these experiences in great detail. Retained memory of details indicates possible homosexual tendencies.
It is my personal opinion that subject is latent homosexual and will matriculate easily into recruit population.
Diary Transcript 11-21-97/15:45hours
I don't know what I am supposed to say, they told me that I have to write down everything about my feelings and observations while here at "the farm".
I never had such a long physical exam before. Never at Roosevelt, never in juvenile hall, never by Dr. Russell back home, never anywhere.
When they were finished taking most of my blood, I was given two shots and they hurt badly! I have never had shots in my balls before. I didn't know that anything could hurt so much! Damn, there goes that green line again. They say we have to use spell check and see to it that our grammar is OK for these diary things. They also told us that we can't use swear words, and it seems that whenever I type one, this little red line shows up under it. I got here at about noon and because of all of the blood work I didn't get lunch. I hope that they feed me soon.
The room I am in is sort of strange. It is not like a jail cell really, and it is not like a motel room either. There is this computer terminal built into the wall and a sort of desk thing. There is what looks like a TV set over my bed also built into the wall and for now I will be in the room alone. They say I will be transferred in about a month in with another guy, and then again in three months into the dorms where I will be with a bunch of other guys.
The only communication I get with the outside world is an e-mail address. My Mom doesn't know how to use a computer and my Dad left us years ago so I guess I am on my own.
I guess I will sign off now
11-21-97/23:35hours
I finally got fed at about six o clock tonight and boy was I hungry! The food was not too bad and they said we had to drink these special hi-protein shake things. After those two shots today my balls still hurt.
11-22-97/05:35hours
I can't believe that they got us up this early! My balls are still sore from yesterday and they are sort of numb and tingle a little. I awakened this morning with what must have been the hardest "hard-on" that I have ever had. The thing was so hard that it hurt. There is this flashing thing down in the corner telling me I have a message. Excuse me and let me check the message. . . . Damn! (the only swear word I can use that the computer doesn't freak over) They are sending my "Counselor" to meet me at 06:00 then I report to the Doc again and then my "Counselor" takes me to the gym.
11-22-97/12:00hours
I can't get over my "Counselor". This place is not like any I have ever been in before. After (Jerry) that's my Counselor's name, outlined the rules and regulations (which really were very few) we went to the Medical Labs and this time I got a shot in my butt. I thanked the male nurse for not shooting me in the balls. He just laughed! One thing that is really weird around here, all of the guys are muscle monsters. I have not yet seen any other "inmates", but the counselors and medical staff are huge! I was a little nervous initially, but I asked Jerry how much he weighed and how tall he was. He said that he was 330 pounds and six foot four inches tall. He treated me real nice and when we went to the gym he changed into some shorts and a sweatshirt and started teaching me how to work out with weights. I screwed up my breathing a bunch of times, but he remained patient with me and as long as I kept trying he was kind of neat.
11-22-97/18:00hours
I don't know why but I feel sort of "hyped" and restless. I tried the TV set and I found that there were a couple of regular stations and then there were two channels that had porn. One channel had stuff with guys and girls and the other channel had stuff with guys and guys. A reform school with built in porn? I have never seen anything like this before! Maybe if I jack-off this hyper and edgy feeling will go away.
11-22-97/22:24hours
I dozed off about an hour ago and had this really weird dream. There were guys trying to have sex with me! I am not a queer! In the dream I was enjoying the sex and that scares me a little bit? I wonder if the stuff they are giving me can make me gay?
11-24-97/06:00hours
Our computer terminals were out of commission yesterday, and it was supposedly some problem that originated in the medical department that caused it. Nothing eventful just starting to get into a routine with life here at "the farm". I checked the mail this morning as I am supposed to, and I have to go to the Medical Department again today. Surprisingly I did not require an escort today, and for the first time I saw another "inmate". He did not say anything, but he was too young to be working here. He looked actually younger than me, but the funny thing was that he was covered with muscles and I could see a shadow where his beard was. I could also see hair on his chest and growing out where his shirt was. We both walked into the Medical Department at the same time and sat in the "waiting area". For some reason I don't understand I am not as scared of this medical stuff as I was. When I leave here I am supposed to meet Jerry at the Gym and do my daily workout.
11-24-97/10:00hours
So far life here has been a "breeze". All I seem to do is eat, get shots, workout, sleep, and watch television. I go for my next workout at 16:00hours. I always thought that when you worked out all the time that your muscles got sore. Mine did for the first day, but even though Jerry pushes me very hard the soreness seems to be getting less and less. The only feeling I get is this sort of full feeling in my muscles like the skin is stretched or something. The other thing that is happening is that I seem to be getting hard-on's more and more often. I finally got the courage to ask Jerry about this and he said that this was normal and would probably increase a great deal more as the stuff they were giving me built up in my system. I jacked off to the guy/guy porn this morning. It was strange but the guy girl stuff just didn't do it and the guys were so much hotter to look at.
11-24-97/20:35hours
I saw the same guy in the hall on my way to the gym that was in the waiting room at the Medical Department. He was dressed a little differently and in a pair of shorts and a T-shirt. He sure had a lot of muscle. The other thing I noticed is how hairy his arms legs and chest are. He is one of those guys with real light skin and real dark hair so the hair shows up a lot. I asked Jerry about him, and he stopped and thought a minute. Oh! I think the guy you are talking about is Tom Halpern. Tom is one of my charges also was Jerry's reply. I asked Jerry how old "Tom" was. Jerry told me that Tom was fifteen years old. It took a few seconds for that to sink in, and then I actually realized that I might end up looking just like Tom, which would not be half-bad! I don't know what to say I am afraid to ask Jerry about what is being done to me. I looked in the mirror and other than the raging hard-on I did not look any different. It's time go get to sleep as 05:30 comes early!
11-25-97/06:10hours
My e-mail said that I was to report directly to the Medical Department this morning and not to eat first. I reported as I was instructed and Jerry was waiting for me there. He explained to me that I was to get my first major "infusion treatment" today, and that unfortunately this would start off with two more shots into my balls. Then they would start what would be the first of two large IV bags. Jerry stayed with me this first time and said that I would be receiving these treatments depending on my blood work at various times. Jerry laughed and said that I would be starting to enjoy these treatments very quickly. He also told me that Tom Halpern had undergone one of these yesterday, and that other recruits go through them all the time. As soon as the infusion was over it was lunchtime. When I went into the eating area I was assigned, Tom Halpern was there and from the plates he had consumed already, it was clear that he had gone through one heck of a lot of food.
Tom continued eating as he nodded acknowledging my presence for the first time. He was in the same T-shirt and shorts that he had worn when I had last seen him, and now even with him sitting and me standing, it was obvious that the T was stretched a great deal tighter. He stood up and I could see that overnight he had gained probably thirty pounds of muscle. In addition, if it were possible, the hair on his body had grown in thicker and darker, and I noticed something else for the first time. The pouch of his shorts was absolutely stuffed with the size of his cock and balls. As Tom finished his final plate, he stood up and the tight T-shirt rode up exposing a slightly rounded but very hairy belly. Self-conscious, Tom pulled the shirt back down and started talking very nicely to me. His voice, unlike mine was deep and resonant, he was very calm and cool as he told me what to expect. I was shocked! Tom told me that when he arrived here at the farm he weighed a scant 105 pounds! He must have weighed easily 180 now. Tom laughed, and said that he was still in "growth phase" and that this stage would not be complete until tomorrow. He was no taller, just more muscular, more masculine and definitely more hairy. Tom told me that when he arrived he had zero body hair, that his cock was only 6 inches long when fully hard, and that his arms wouldn't have been worth measuring. I asked Tom how long he had been at "the farm". He thought a moment and said about two months. He seemed to be growing before my eyes. He kept scratching his chest, arms and legs. He noticed my stare, his only comment was that during the growth phase it all "itches". I told Tom that I had just had my first "infusion treatment" and he told me that in a few hours I would start the "ride".
Part 2
11-25-97/15:20 hours
The only thing that I have noticed since my first "infusion treatment" was that I was really hungry. I have never been a big eater, but at lunch today I seemed uncontrollably ravenous. The other thing was that it seemed like the more I ate, the more I wanted to eat. When I got up from the table I was embarrassed because my belly stuck out to the point that I looked like some pregnant female.
There's that stupid message thing down at the corner of the computer screen again. Just a minute, let me check and see what it is that my "keepers" want.
Looks like I am supposed to report to medical again. God, I hope that they don't poke me again!
11-25-97/18:00 hours
I just returned from my evening meal, and it was weird. I was no hungrier than normal when I got there, but when I started to smell the food it was almost like a drug to me. The more I smelled it, the more I wanted to eat, and I managed to go through six plates. By the time I finished eating my belly was bulging hugely. Tom Halpern saw me in the hallway after dinner, and when he looked at my huge bulging belly, he started laughing! This kind of scared me! He then smiled at me and said, "Don't worry kid, it's just part of the ride!" As I sit here typing this into my diary, I am so stuffed and my big belly is so hard and round that I can hardly breathe!
The one good thing I guess was that because of the infusion treatment they told me that I would not be doing the "workout" with Jerry, but that this would resume tomorrow. I would not workout for about 18 hours after the infusion treatment. The other thing that is weird is that in spite of being so stuffed that I can hardly move, I am still slightly hungry.
I think that I will lay down and relax for a few hours.
11-25-97/23:45 hours
I awakened and it seems that whatever I had tonight has made me start needing to piss like a racehorse. I have so far been up about four times and peed for what seemed to be like 5 minutes straight. My belly looks more like normal now, but my balls are sure sore! I wonder if I strained them somehow? 11-26-97/05:45 hours
Damn, that f- — - — - — alarm! Damn! Ok, OK, OK! I won't use that word! Jeez- — ! What? You won't let me use that one either! I'm awake already! 11-26-97/05:55
I am supposed to report to medical again? F- — - ! Sorry, Sorry! Don't blow a microchip!
Damn, I feel like I was run over by a Greyhound Bus! Everything hurts! O O W W W W ! My neck, my back!
I am so sore that I can hardly move. Even my hands hurt!
11-26-97/06:15
When I got to medical the guy there took one look at me and said. "You look like you're hurtin' a bit there kid!" Boy was that the understatement of the earth! " We sent out the page for you this morning because the discomfort you're in kind of goes with the infusion treatments in some people." " At least you're moving, one of Jerry's other charges Tom Halpern, was so bad off that he had to be carried in here so that we could give this stuff to him." "This will kill the discomfort completely in about an hour." "The worst will be gone in about 10 minutes." "Tom still has problems the morning after an infusion."
He handed me a glass of some clear looking stuff. It tasted sort of like sweet cough syrup, but without the real nasty part. It was sort of thick almost like motor oil, but it really did not taste all that bad.
As I left the office I saw Tom Halpern heading towards the gym. He looked at me with a macho swagger and in a snide voice said; "Havin' a rough ride kid?"
At that moment my temper flared, but I decided to handle the problem a different way. I had to get back in to the gym with Jerry today and I at this moment did not know how I was going to do it. Damn. I still hurt like h- — - and I felt like I imagined my Grandma must have felt when she was in her 80's.
11-26-97/11:00 hours
That guy was right, I slept for a while and when I awakened the pain was totally gone. There is this weird feeling left. It is like my skin is stretched tight over my whole body, and it is sort of like weird, but it doesn't really feel bad, just different from anything I have ever experienced.
There is this stupid thing for new mail on the CRT screen. I am supposed to report to the medical department on the way to the gym.
11-26-97/11:30 hours
The guy in the medical department's name is Kerry. I have a cousin named Kerry, I've never met him. But, I guess that I can use this to remember this medical guy.
At medical all I had to do was to step on the scale. Damn! I gained 10 pounds! I've only been here 5 days and I've gained 10 pounds!
Gotta go workout now, I only came back because Jerry gave me these really neat lifting gloves as a present. That was kind of nice. My ma never had the money to give me anything, and my dad, well he took off when I was about 3 years old.
11-26-97/15:30 hours
When I was working out I told Jerry what Tom Halpern had done and how it made me mad. Jerry just chuckled and said: "He did, did he!" Well, give me a few days and I will see what I can do to see to it that it doesn't happen again! I'll get back to you on that one!
11-27-97/16:00 hours
Not much to report today, my appetite seems to be getting back to normal or more normal and I feel more energetic.
11-28-97/07:45 hours
I just got back from the shower room and I noticed something changing. I don't know how I've missed it, but the hair around the base of my dick has grown a lot thicker and started to spread. I also noticed that the hair under my arms has grown and spread too. There are fine new hairs spreading out to my hipbones and fine hair around the patch that I always had at least for a few years under my arms. What a trip!
11-29-97/08:05 hours
In the shower room I noticed that there is some fine fuzz on my face. There is a little bit of fuzz over my upper lip and a little bit near where my sideburns would be (if I had any).
11-30-97/05:55 hours
They want me to report to medical for a blood "donation" and they told me not to eat first!
12-01-97/06:00 hours The note from medical said that all is progressing well and that I might be ready for another "infusion" by the end of next week. Oh Joy! I get to have pain all over again!
12-02-97/06:00 hours
There is a mail not that I am supposed to report to Jerry's office. I hope that I haven't done anything wrong!
12-02-97/11:00 hours
Jerry was laughing when he ushered me in to his office. He showed me a chair and asked me to sit down. I was still afraid that I had done something wrong! He said that the reason that he had called me in was related to my "little problem" with Tom Halpern.
He told me that he had just come back from medical and that Tom was due for another "infusion treatment" tomorrow. He also said that Tom had no business "mouthing off" to me because he is still a "basket case" the morning after his infusion. "So, together you and I are going to turn the tables". He also said that he had seen Tom do the same thing to another recruit two days ago. "Tom's punishment will be doing his workout without the pain killer!" He will do that workout in front of you and the other boy who's name is Lance. My blood ran cold at the thought! How awful man! That would be pain beyond belief!
I have to admit that the thought of watching this bothers me. I've done some things wrong in my life, and the more I am in here I seem to think about them more and more. All they have ever done to me in here is treat me with kindness, but I see now that this Jerry can be one sadistic — - — (cant use that word) when he want's to.
12-03-97/08:00 hours
God I am scared! Right now Tom is being attached to that IV and there is not a thing that I can do about it. I know what I felt like the morning after! I could hardly walk everything hurt so bad!
12-03-97/18:00 hours
I saw Tom at dinner and boy was he shoveling it in. Amazingly enough he looks even bigger than he did last time. He seemed almost happy and cheerful. There were only about eight other guys assigned to our dining area I wondered if any of them were Lance.
12-03-97/23:12 hours
Right now I can't sleep. I am for the first time since I got here really afraid. I can't even imagine what I am going to see tomorrow.
12-04-97/04:55 hours
I don't know what I am going to see today, and I am scared. God am I scared! I was not this scared when I was arrested those times in the past. I wasn't even this scared when ma cried so many times. I can see the flashing on the CRT and I am afraid to look at it. It could be me. If I screw up it could be me feeling what Tom is going to feel.
12-04-97/05:15 hours
I finally worked up the courage to read the e-mail. It was from Jerry telling me to report to the gym at my regular time. 12-04-97/13:00 hours
I reported to the gym as I had been instructed and when I got there, I was greeted by Jerry who seemed to be in a rather happy and jovial mood. This in and of itself is scary! How could one be so happy when he is about to do what Jerry is about to do!
Tom Halpern was not there yet. There was another fellow there and he, I guessed, must be "Lance". Lance was probably about my age. He was sandy haired, skinny like me, and dressed in a pair of shorts that were really "baggy" on him.
A few minutes later Tom Halpern was literally carried in by two huge guys. At this point Jerry looked at Lance and I, and said: "Ah! The guest of honor has arrived!" Tom was dressed in shorts and a white T-shirt as well as the standard tennis shoes that were expected in the gym.
The only words said by Jerry were: "Lay him down on the bench!"
Right now Tom Halpern didn't look macho, he didn't look like he had attitude, he looked like someone in a great deal of pain.
Jerry walked to one of the lockers and unlocked it. He grabbed a device that was about 18 inches long and it had two short metal electrodes on one end, two switches, and a button on it. I didn't know what this was, and by the puzzled look on Lance's face he didn't either. It was a cylinder in shape and kind of looked like a weird flashlight.
Jerry walked over to Tom who was lying back on the bench. I could see that Tom did not feel very well and was in pain. He was also puzzled in some manner it appeared as to what was going on.
Jerry spoke:
Mr. Halpern, over the past few weeks I have seen some attitude problems from you. Over the past six weeks you have lived like this was one big resort hotel. If you "tow the mark" it can be. If you fuck up, I am the one who will dole out your punishment! Mr. Halpern, I have witnessed on two occasions a total lack of sympathy towards your fellow recruits when they were in "growth phase" and in pain. You, sir are not one who has any right to complain on this front! After "infusion" you are a worthless piece of shit! You, on two separate occasions made fun of both Mr. Kilvaney and Mr. Olsen when you knew they were in pain. Mr. Halpern, you yourself are one of the worst crybabies I have ever seen when it comes to "growth phase" discomfort. On several occasions I have had to take the pain meds to your room myself because you couldn't get out of bed. These two were far more courageous than you Mr. Halpern. They made it to medical under their own power Mr. Halpern! In honor of your behavior Mr. Halpern, you are going to complete your workout today without the benefit of any painkillers!
Tom Halpern lost what little color was left in his face and in a hoarse voice replied: "Sir, I can't please give me the pain medication and in an hour I will do anything you want!"
Jerry replied: "No Tom, for the first time in your life you're going to have to tough this one out on your own!"
Now it was obvious that Tom was really scared! He wasn't crying but I could see that there were tears forming in his eyes.
Jerry motioned to one of the other fellows, which had remained hovering in the background. He said only one word, "Minerva". The fellow returned with a machine and computer terminal. There was a very light clothing suit that looked like a leotard that a male ballet star might ware except that it was nearly transparent.
At this point the two goons removed Tom's T-shirt and replaced the top half with the light stretchy leotard material. They lifted Tom like he didn't weigh anything and dressed him in the pant like lower portion. Then they added light stocking like foot pieces and workout gloves. As they added each piece there were small plugs that were all plugged together. The final plug was then like a computer cable plugged in to the back of the machine.
Jerry then said:
Minerva is a variation on an electronic muscle stimulator. The major difference is that with "Minerva" I can completely control every movement in Tom's body. I could have used that cattle prod, but that would only accomplish one phase of what I want. I can have my assistants place Mr. Halpern's hands or feet and then the computer at my instructions will work each muscle group to failure. And today boys I do mean FAILURE! Mr. Halpern is going to get the most grueling full body workout that is possible.
There was a look of total terror on Tom's face. He was in so much pain from the "growth phase" that he couldn't easily move. He couldn't run! He couldn't resist!
Jerry then told the two "goons" to load the bar with 150 pounds for a "warm up". They did as they were told. Jerry told Tom to place his hands on the bar at shoulder width as it was time to work his chest! Tom winced still in great pain as he slowly slid his hands on to the bar. Just as he did this Jerry pushed a button on the machine. As he did this I could see Tom's hands lock in a tight grip on the bar. Jerry then pushed another series of buttons and against his will Tom started lifting the weight and in perfect form bringing it down towards his chest then up again. After the fifth rep Tom was moaning and crying out in pain as he forced even the light weight up to the top of it's travel. The only control he had in his body was in the screams of pain and the computer controlling his breathing even made that hard.
After what Jerry considered an adequate warm-up he had the "goons" load the bar with 350 pounds!
I watched Tom pump that 350 pound barbell up and down. The sweat was running off of him in rivers. He was breathing properly between the gasps and cries! His already huge chest pumped larger and larger. As the weight was lowered down to the rest on the bench the two "goons" had already gotten dumbells ready for other chest exercises. Just as his hands came into contact with the dumbell bars again Jerry pushed the buttons and Tom involuntarily responded. The weights were heavy and as Tom could he screamed at the top of his lungs from the pain he was in. He exercised in perfect form, and as I watched this I started feeling sick. I watched Jerry repeat this exercise after exercise until there was literally nothing left of Tom either physically or mentally. When Tom's huge muscles began to falter Jerry turned a dial, which I guess turned up the voltage on the machine. Tom's screams of pain grew more and more hoarse until finally there were none. Only wide eyes and a look of impending death. It seemed like hours that this horrible torture went on. Then, it was over. Tom stiffened up with all of his muscles turning to stone momentarily and then simply "passed out". Jerry checked him and said: "This little pansy fainted!"
The two assistants placed Tom's body in a wheelchair. He was naked, and all they did was to cover him over with a blanket.
Jerry then looked at us and said: "OK boys, we've had enough fun! Time for your workouts!"
As we completed our workouts which were nothing compared to the electronic torture that Tom had just endured, we introduced ourselves.
Jerry just laughed and pointing at Tom, said: "While he was here, we moved this "little cherub's" room over next to yours."
"Lance, I apologize, but we moved you over to one of the two vacant rooms next to Mike, which is 314, and "this" (pointing to Tom) goes into 316." Part of the "cure" for this man's attitude is that now until he heals up, he is going to be totally dependent on the two guys he insulted!" "He still is not going to get any pain killer, and if you think that he was hurting this morning, wait until tomorrow!" "The idea is to make him think before he opens his mouth in the future." "Sorry guys, but Tom won't even be able to go to the bathroom by himself tomorrow." "You're his keepers!" "Do what's right here. and I can guarantee that he will never ever do anything like this again!" "I'll let him have some pain killer, but only when I see personally that he has truly made amends to both of you."
12-04-97/17:15
Well, I finally had a chance to sit down and think about what happened a great deal more. Trying to get nearly 200 pounds of dead weight out of a wheel chair and into a bed was harder than I ever dreamed possible. Lance and I wheeled Tom in the wheel chair to a shower room near our room. We removed the blankets and in the wheel chair we used a hose and sprayer that I had not noticed before. It must have been there all the time, but it was the only way to get the sweat and other mess off of poor Tom. When we turned the hose on Tom he stirred, but he didn't wake up. The other thing that was kind of weird was that as we started hosing him down he started pissing like a fire hose. The only good thing is that Tom's cock is so big that it was off the edge of the seat and aimed at the floor by it's own weight. We were able to just wash the urine down the drain.
Both Lance and I have gained a great deal of strength and I now know that. Lifting Tom and maneuvering his dead weight into his bed would have been impossible for me a very short time ago. It only makes me wonder what is coming.
