By Sean Innicioni 
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• Latest update: 11 January. Next update: 25 January. (Submissions welcome.)

• Latest post: Saturday Flashback: January 2013.

• Latest from BRK: “One hot summer”, Parts 5‑9.


I had the best body out of all of them, and I knew it. Everyone else knew it too, and that’s why I could have whoever I chose for myself. Plenty of people wanted my rock-hard muscles or my even harder cock, but I didn’t want any of them. Just a mirror was enough for me. Of course, it meant I would be alone for a long time, but it was worth it. Then my life changed, and I found the perfect person for me.

“Nick, where are you going?” Sean called after me. He didn’t bother hiding his erection, but I didn’t bother hiding my lack of interest.

“Home, and away from you wannabes” I called back. I remember that night. It was cool but not cold. Warm enough for me to go without a shirt, and that was enough for me. As I made my way from the gym, I decided to take a shortcut home through the woods. In theory, it would have saved me about a half hour. In reality, it took much longer than that, but I didn’t complain with what I got out of it.

As I walked along and a cool breeze graced my bare chest, I noticed a light between the trees. Curious, I made my way closer, hiding behind the largest trunk that was merely two feet away.

“It’s no use,” I heard a voice call. “The engine is blown, and without a fire we’ll never get it started.”

“Of all the stupid things,” another voice replied. “Come sightseeing on this primitive rock just to get stuck by something a student could fix in a heartbeat!”

Poking my head around to try and make sense of what the voices were saying, I gasped and fell over. Standing around a large silver spaceship were two amazingly handsome guys, almost as beautiful as me. But what caught my attention was their four legs. Each of them had two pairs, kinda like a centaur except they looked human.

“We’ve been seen!” the closer one yelled, pulling out a gun and pointing it at me. “Farvel, we have to kill it!”

“Not so fast, Shival,” the other one replied. “Perhaps this human can be of use to us. Human?”

“What do you need?” I asked cautiously, not taking my eyes off the gun. It looked like something straight out of a Star Wars movie.

“We require fire, and unfortunately, your atmosphere limits our skills at creating one. All the oxygen here. Hmph!” the alien called Farvel muttered. “Could you help us, perhaps? If you do, we can grant you a special gift.”

“Gift? What gift?!” Shival yelled. “We need fire, not to give presents out to every earthling we see!”

Without a second thought I pulled my lighter out of my pocket. Tossing it to Shival I said, “Take it; it’s a lighter.”

In one swift motion Shival lit the flame and tossed it into his ship, creating a beautiful golden glow. “I suppose now we have to reward him,” he snorted to his partner.

Farvel approached me and pulled out a slender sci-fi pistol. “Now, now, don’t worry,” he said, placing a hand on my shoulder so that I couldn’t run away. “We’re aliens, as you might have guessed. Your human tongue can’t pronounce our name, but we’re very similar to you. For helping us out, we’re going to help you skip a few years of evolution.”

I was too stunned to move, and too confused to say anything. Apparently taking my silence as consent, Farvel shot me with the pistol and headed for his ship. I was enveloped in a warm neon green glow, and tried to cry out. Within a moment, the glow faded and I fell onto my knees—all four of them.

“Do you like it?” Farvel asked.

I looked down at myself. My pants and underwear had disintegrated, but I didn’t care. Where my ass should have been, another ass stuck out from my back attached to a second pair of legs. I rose to my feet, and marveled at the strange new sensation of flesh against flesh, and then I bent over. Something felt odd, and to my joy I saw that between my second pair of legs I had a second cock, which was already getting hard and poking at my original asshole. “I love it,” I gasped as I grabbed my original cock, which was threatening to slap against my abs.

“You’re now one of us,” Farvel said with a smile. “And you may notice a few things are different.”

I looked at him puzzled, but the feeling of my cock at the opening of my asshole was too wonderful. Wait, did it feel wet inside? What was going on?

“Before we go, I’ll explain the main differences. We’re the—” I could hardly understand the name of his species, much less try to pronounce it “—and we’re hermaphrodites. Each of us has the genitals of a male and a female. We have what you humans call a vagina where you would have what you call an anus.”

Well that explained the sheer ecstasy I was feeling as my cock began to slide into my ass—former asshole. “We cannot reproduce asexually, though pleasuring ourselves is usually more than enough. I hope the gift of being able to pleasure yourself as we can is acceptable. After all, you’ve enabled us to get home without having to cause a riot by walking into your human town,” Farvel continued.

“No problem,” I replied, trying not to gasp as new nerves eagerly responded to a strange yet somehow proper feeling of penetration. “Thank you!”

“It is my pleasure, or more accurately, yours,” Farvel answered. Shival rolled his eyes. “Farewell, kind human!” With that, the doors to the spaceship closed and it took off, leaving me alone and naked in the middle of the forest.

I smiled to myself and grabbed my front cock as I literally fucked myself in my new vagina. I began to rub up and down my shaft as new muscles clenched and my back cock slowly pulled in and out of myself. The feeling was unimaginable ecstasy. I kept it up for at least two hours, jacking my front cock and filling myself with my back. Even when I shot load after load into the air and myself, I remained hard, and was able to do it again and again. When I finally stopped, I looked at my watch and saw that it had been three hours since I left the gym. In a panic, I ran home through the woods, ignoring my monstrous hardons as balls slapped against balls and tickled my—screw it, I don’t care if it is a vagina, I’m still calling it an asshole.

After I fell asleep, I dreamed of myself. I was looking in a mirror admiring my new body, and suddenly I was pulling myself out of the mirror as my monstrous hardons became unbearable. I smiled at myself and we slid into each other, the perfect masturbation act. For the entire night I screwed myself, pouring my love and arousal into myself, smiling at my beautiful face and running a hand through my long brown hair. Just as I leaned in to kiss myself, I awoke and turned to the mirror.

I wasn’t disappointed to find that I still had the four legs and two cocks, but now I knew who would be perfect for me; myself. I walked over to the mirror and sighed sadly. “Sheer pleasure they’ve given me,” I said to my reflection, “But I could know love if only I had you.” I hung my head and placed my hand on the mirror. Odd, it felt colder than an ice cube. I looked up to see my reflection looking down at me, no longer reflecting my actions.

“They’ve given you me,” the other me said to me. With a smile he grabbed my arm and pulled himself from the mirror.

I didn’t even bother to question how. Instantly I was locking lips with myself, sliding my hand across my own pecs, not feeling it myself, marveling at having another me. We didn’t need to talk. We already knew we were perfect for each other.

He climbed into the bed first and smiled seductively at me, spreading his four legs wide in invitation. His hardons were just as big as mine, and we slipped into each other’s asses at the same time. “We can be together forever,” the other me whispered into my ear as we gasped at the sheer pleasure of penetration and penetrating.

“A love that won’t tire, that will make everyone jealous,” I replied, beginning to slowly move my cocks in and out, in and out, in and out as he did the same to me.

“No one is better for me than me, Nick. And no one is better for you than you, which is me.”

I put a finger over my other self’s mouth and we stared into each other’s eyes, my heart pounding with love and yearning and desire. I shot my love into him and he shot his into me. We locked lips and shared our love for hours, our tongues playing with each other, both of us exactly alike.

Finally when we finished I pulled myself out of and off of him, wrapping his torso—my own perfect torso—in a hug. He returned it and we kissed again. I knew then and there that I would never leave me, that those aliens had brought me my lover, my husband, my true joy in life; they had brought me myself, and they had brought myself me. And now I know that the greatest pleasures CAN come from yourself, if you try hard enough, and if your love is strong enough.

But now I have to go. I’m getting impatient as I write, and the other me wants to try blowing today. I must admit, I’ve always wanted to blow myself, and now I’m going to find out just how great it really is.

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