Crotchhead town: Confessions

by Cockatrice   

Chris visits his friends for a little trip, surprising them with his new form. Unfortunately, not everyone has the reaction he hoped for.

I looked up at the display, impatiently waiting for the next stop. It wasn’t that I was feeling uncomfortable outside of crotchhead town, but as a crotchhead, one definitely notices differences in accommodation and frequency of seeing others whose heads aren’t on top of their shoulders.

The middle-aged man across from me gave an odd look as he sat down. I rolled my eyes internally and looked away. Sure, I also sometimes get stared at in crotchhead town, but it happens much more rarely and knowing that you are in the minority gives them an additional weight here.

Still, I wasn’t feeling uncomfortable, simply a little bit awkward.

Finally the train stopped and I got up. Luckily, my friend wasn’t living far from the station.

I rang the bell and heard Ron’s voice from the speaker. “Hello?”

“It’s me, Chris.”

The door buzzed and I made my way to Ron’s apartment.

He must have heard me approach the door and opened it, his eyes first landing on my empty shoulders before moving down and widening.

I smiled. “Surprise.”

“Chris.” He smiled back, in disbelief, as he made way for me to enter. “What the fuck?”

“I know, I know.” I slipped out of my shoes and put my bags down. “Everyone here already?”

“Yeah, you’re the last.” Ron closed the door. “They’re in the living room.”

Apparently our conversation carried over to the rest of the flat as Steven poked his head into the hallway, looking at me with a bewildered, yet friendly look. “Dude!”

“I knooooow.” It wasn’t that I was deliberately trying to keep it a secret, but I hadn’t met my friends since I became a crotchhead and there wasn’t a good opportunity to tell, except for Luke, who asked me about living together with crotchheads in a shared flat and, well, the topic came up.

I entered the living room where both Luke and Alan were sitting on a couch. Although Luke already knew, he hadn’t seen me yet in my new form.

“Tada.” I presented myself.

Luke merely nodded, while Alan was simply staring at me. It wasn’t the reaction I was hoping for.

Before the situation could get awkward, Steven spoke up. “So, we’re ready to go then?”

“Sure.” Ron hesitated and looked at me. “Do you want a drink before we leave?”

“Yeah, just water.” Truth be told, it had been a long ride and I was a bit thirsty.

It felt good that my friends, despite their initial surprise, quickly adapted and didn’t make a big deal out of me being a crotchhead. I glanced over to Alan, who looked away.

Well, most of my friends, at least.

After a short break we quickly grabbed our bags and made our way to Ron’s car. We were going on a three-hour ride to a lake where we would spend the weekend.

As I was packing my stuff in the trunk, Steven pointed at the thing in my hand. “What’s that?”

“A foldable bar stool.”

“Why? What for?”

“You’ll see.”

“Fine. Keep your secrets.” Steven rolled his eyes. “Wanna sit in the middle?” Steven, Luke and I would be sitting in the back, while Ron would drive and Alan was sitting in the front passenger seat.

I shrugged. “Sure.” I wouldn’t really see much anyway, due to my low vantage point, but I guess it was the thought that counts.”

“Well then.” Steven stood next to the open door. “After you.”

I crawled in and fastened the seat belt, putting the lower loop behind my head.

Once everyone was in and Ron began to drive, Luke turned to me. “So, tell us everything.”

“About what?”

“You know what,” Luke insisted. “Why did you do it and what’s it like?”

I laughed. “Well, it felt right at the moment. Still does.” I recalled the events. “Actually, it was a condition for getting into the flat, now that I remember.”

Luke furrowed his brow. “You’re kidding.”

“No. It’s not as bad as it sounds. I think the other two would have let me in, but one of the guys was against it and I did it as a compromise.”

“What an asshole,” Steven scoffed.

“Nah, he’s cool.” I realized how it must have sounded to people who weren’t there. “We get along well. And I wasn’t really pressured into it that much.”

“So…” Luke smirked. “You wanted to become a crotchhead then?”

I blushed. “I mean, I think a part of me wanted that from the start, yeah.”

“So, how is it then?” Ron asked without taking his eyes from the road. “I heard your head is like a dick now.”

I blushed even more, feeling my ears getting hot. “Yeah, your dick gets merged into your head, so it feels pretty amazing. It doesn’t get hard though.”

“So where does your jizz come out?” Steven wanted to know.

I looked up at him. “Take a wild guess.”

“Shit, that’s insane.” Steven’s face changed as if realizing something. “And your piss?”

“Same.”

“Ew.”

“Eh, it’s not as bad as it sounds.” I shrugged. “My urethral opening is at the tip of my tongue, so I can just stick it out for peeing.”

“Yeah, but you’ll still taste it.”

“It’s a bit uncomfortable at first, but nothing you can’t get used to.” I thought for a moment. “I had to stop eating asparagus though.”

“Heh,” was Steven’s only response.

“Let’s talk about the rest when we’re there.” I yawned. “I’m a bit tired.”

“Sure.”

I pushed my thighs together. One of the perks nobody talked about was that as a crotchhead you always had a pair of pillows when you were sitting.

I wedged my head between my thighs and closed my eyes, quickly dozing off for the rest of the ride.

“Who wants to go for a swim?” Steven asked.

After we had arrived at our vacation home and dropped our stuff, we went to the nearby lake, the reason why we came here in the first place.

“I’m in,” I said and saw the others nodding.

Ron looked at Alan who hadn’t reacted. “What about you?”

Alan waved him off. “I’ll stay here. Someone has to.”

“All right.” As if remembering something, Ron looked at me. “How are you even going to go into the water?”

Instead of a verbal answer, I simply pulled out my snorkel and underwater goggles. The snorkel was much longer than a regular one, going almost the entire length of a human body. It was fastened to the torso with two straps so that the top would be attached to my chest and extend over my shoulders. I put on both and presented myself as the answer.

Ron raised an eyebrow in surprise, while Steven barely could hold back his laughter.

“You look absolutely ridiculous,” he finally brought out.

“I know, but it’s the only way if I don’t want to drown.” I grabbed my inflatable ring and started blowing it up.

Luke inspected the end of my snorkel. “Why is it curved down?”

“Prevents it from filling with water when it’s submerged,” I explained. “It’s specially made for crotchheads, if that wasn’t obvious.”

“You know,” Ron began. “If you had told me, we could have done something else, instead of going to a lake.”

“No, no, it’s fine. I like going to the lake,” I said between breaths. “And it’s not like I don’t have to find ways to accommodate myself for lots of things outside of crotchhead town anyway.”

“Like what?”

“Cinema, restaurants, pretty much anywhere you sit.”

“Mmh, sounds kinda like a pain,” Luke mused.

I smiled. “It can be inconvenient, but it’s worth it.”

“If you say so.”

By now I was done blowing up my ring. “All right let’s go.”

Before we left for the shore, I glanced over to Alan, who quickly looked away.

As we walked, I caught up to Luke. “Is anything wrong with Alan?”

“Mmh, he’s definitely quieter today than usual,” he agreed.

“You think it’s because I’m a crotchhead now?”

“Are you worried he might be judging you?”

“I mean…” I started.

“I don’t know. Doesn’t seem like him.” He stepped into the water. “He’d rather argue about the merits of being a crotchhead if he disagreed instead of just blanking you entirely.”

“To be fair,” Ron chimed in. “Alan wasn’t like this before he saw you, Chris.”

“So it is because I’m a crotchhead then?” I pressed.

Luke shrugged. “Maybe he’s just slower to process it.”

I looked back at Alan up on the beach. “Mmh.”

“Just don’t worry about it. It’ll sort itself out.” Luke went further into the lake. “Now come in, the water’s nice.”

Ron turned to me after he closed the door of the car. “So, do you need anything from the trunk?”

After the lake we wanted to go eat at a restaurant and I had specifically asked Ron to get us there by car because I needed to transport some things in the trunk. “I don’t know yet. I’ll have to check with the staff.”

“Mmh, okay.” Apparently Ron didn’t know what to make of my cryptic reply.

We had barely made our way inside when one of the waiters saw me and came over, with an almost alarmed look on his face. “We’re very sorry, but we’re not equipped for crotchheads.”

“I do have my own accommodations, if that’s fine,” I probed. I wasn’t sure whether he was genuinely sorry that he couldn’t provide the service to me or if he was just kindly telling me to leave. It had never happened to me, but I’ve heard stories that some places just flat out refused crotchheads.

He thought for a moment, the gears turning in his head, trying to figure out what I meant. “Uh sure, if you want.”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s all right.” I turned to Ron. “Okay, I do need to get something from the car then.”

Ron and I went back and retrieved my foldable bar stool from the trunk before joining our friends, who had already been seated at a table.

“And this—” I placed down the foldable bar stool that had pretty much the same height as the table. “-is what I need it for.”

“Ahh.” Steven had finally received the answer to this question from earlier today. “So, do restaurants in crotchhead town all have bar stools then?”

I sat down to join my friends at the table. “Nah, the tables are lower.”

“But then normal people can’t eat there?”

“People can sit on the ground,” Luke objected.

I began flipping through the menu. “They do that, yeah, though they do have some pillow-kinda seats so you’re not literally on the ground.” I shot Steven a playfully disappointed look. “Also, ‘normal people’?”

He rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean. Do you have a word for people who aren’t crotchheads?”

“We do, actually.”

“What is it?”

“Fly.”

Everyone at the table thought for a moment.

Steven furrowed his brow. “Why?”

I smiled, thinking back to how my roommates explained it to me. “Because when you stand in front of one, that’s all you see of them.”

“So what’s it like then?” Steven wanted to know. “Being a crotchhead?”

I thought for a moment but then shrugged in defeat. “I don’t know how to explain it. It’s honestly kinda awesome, minus the daily inconveniences. It’s one of those things you have to experience for yourself to really know what it’s like.”

“Do they offer trial runs?” Ron joked.

“Okay, fine.” Luke looked at me. “Single best thing about being a crotchhead, go.”

I didn’t have to think long. “Kissing.”

Everyone grinned at the thing I was hinting at, except for Alan whose eyes were glued to the menu.

“Does it feel like docking to you?” Steven smirked.

I shrugged. “Dunno, never did docking.” I lowered my voice so the other patrons didn’t hear. “But I mean, it’s kinda like rubbing your dicks together.”

Steven’s smirk widened, but before he could say anything, our server appeared. “Do you already know what you want to drink?”

“So what are your roommates like?” Steven was sipping from his cocktail.

In the evening, me and my friends decided to go to a club to have some fun. While Luke and Steven already had a boyfriend, they still got to enjoy the eye candy.

“I’m really the number one topic these days, huh?” I joked.

“I mean, you made yourself into it.”

I glanced over to Alan, who was staring into his own drink. I couldn’t recall him smiling once since I saw him again. Seemed like not everybody was happy about the latest topic.

“Mmh, they’re cool,” I finally answered Steven’s question. “Honestly, if you wanna come visit me in crotchhead town, I can introduce them to you. I think you’d get along well.”

Steven nodded. “Maybe we can do that, yeah.”

“Are there any crotchheads at your university?” Luke wanted to know.

“Plenty, yeah. Both professors and students.”

Ron just returned from the bar, a fresh drink in his hand. “What did I miss?”

“Me being bombarded with questions.” I laughed.

“I can’t believe you guys started the interrogation without me.”

“Eh, don’t worry, we got this,” Steven replied. “Alan was the bad cop.”

There was a short awkward pause as nobody knew how to react to Alan’s strange behavior lately. Reading the room had never been Steven’s strong suit.

Ron nodded towards me. “So how does dating work for crotchheads?”

“What do you mean?” I was confused. “The same as it does for everyone.”

“Do crotchheads prefer to keep to themselves or are pairing with flies common?”

I thought for a moment before shrugging. “Depends on the person, but I know more mixed couples than crotchhead only ones.”

“Mmh.”

“Why, you looking for a crotchhead boyfriend?”

“Sure, why not?” Ron took a sip. “Maybe I should pay crotchhead town a visit.”

“We were literally just talking about going there one day,” Steven chimed in.

“Looks like it’s settled then.”

“Also, why do you want a crotchhead boyfriend?” Steven asked. “You’d have to drive him everywhere because he can’t use a car.”

“I have to drive you guys around everywhere,” Ron retorted.

“Hey, I offered to drive.”

“Yeah, but I don’t trust you with my car,” Ron smirked.

I zoned out of the banter and looked at my empty drink. “I’ll get a refill,” I said and made my way to the bar.

As I was waiting for my drink, I noticed someone appearing next to me. “Hey there.”

I turned to my left and saw a leather crotch with a noticeable bulge. I looked up to see a handsome man looking down at me, drink in hand.

“Hi,” I said.

“Don’t think I’ve ever seen a crotchhead around here.”

“I’m from outside,” I explained. “Went to the lake with friends for the weekend.”

“Nice.” He looked me up and down. “And, how do you like it?”

“It’s pretty. Not many accommodations for crotchheads though.”

“I can imagine.” He raised his drink. “I’m Ty by the way.”

I grabbed my own drink that the barkeeper had just finished. “Chris.”

“You know,” Ty continued. “I’m curious what it’s like with a crotchhead. You up for it?”

I looked down at his crotch. It did look pretty tasty. “Sure, why not?”

Ty led me to a small booth reserved for exactly these kinds of hookups. There was even a condom dispenser in the corner.

After closing the curtain he guided me to sit down and then knelt in front of me.

“Do you cum out of your mouth?”

“Uh huh,” I confirmed.

“Precum too?”

I nodded.

Ty leaned forward and made out with me. We continued kissing until a salty taste appeared in my mouth.

He pulled back, licking his lips. “Fuck, that’s hot.” He looked at me while he fumbled with his crotch. “Your turn.” He winked at me and sat on the bench on my left.

I smiled as I positioned myself on his lap, his cock inches away from my face. I took it in my mouth and started working my tongue around it. More and more of our combined precum filled my mouth.

As his cock grew larger, Ty grabbed my butt and began thrusting his hips into me. I steadied myself on the wall behind him and let him fuck my mouth until he came. The sudden surge of cum triggered my own orgasm and I quickly swallowed both of our seed.

I moved my head away, letting his cock flop back out into the open.

“Shit, I wouldn’t mind doing that again some other time,” Ty panted. “Don’t hesitate hitting me up when you’re in the area.”

I laughed. “Sure.”

He zipped up and made his way to the curtain. “See you.” With that he left.

I sat there for some more moments, basking in the afterglow, before I also made my way back to my friends.

Steven grinned from ear to ear. “Had fun?” Looks like my friends saw me leaving the bar together with Ty.

“Yeah.” I looked around. “Where’s Alan?”

“He said he had to get some fresh air and went outside.” Luke pointed to the entrance door. “Just a few seconds ago.”

I wondered if it was related to me and Ty making out. He must have seen Ty exit the booth. Was Alan maybe not only judgemental, but actually disgusted?

I didn’t know if talking to him would solve anything, but I knew that I had to try. And him being outside by himself was the perfect opportunity to do this without causing a scene.

So I went outside and looked for Alan, who was standing there, a small distance away, looking down the street.

“Hey,” I said as I approached.

Alan looked surprised and took a deep breath. “Hi.”

“Can I ask what’s wrong?”

“Huh?”

“You’re not talking to me. You’re avoiding eye contact.” I gestured. “Even Steven has noticed.”

Alan just looked away.

“Do you have a problem with me?”

Alan snapped back to face me and furrowed his brow. “No.”

“Then what’s the matter?”

Alan sighed. “I don’t know where to begin.”

“Doesn’t matter. Just spit it out.”

Alan took a deep breath as if to brace himself. “I’ve had a bit of a crush on you.”

Oh man, this better not be one of those ‘But now look at yourself.’ talks.

“And now?”

“Still do, I guess.” Alan shrugged. “But, since I’ve seen you like this… I can’t stop thinking about anything else.”

“So you have a problem with me being a crotchhead?”

“What? No.” Alan shook his head. “Are you not listening?”

“You said you can’t stop thinking about me being a crotchhead.”

“Yes, I can’t think straight, because I think it’s fucking hot.”

“Oh.” He wasn’t judgemental. He was nervous. “Oh…”

Alan made a pained expression. “Fuck… I’m not drunk enough for this.”

I leaned against the wall next to him. “And here I thought the whole time that you’re silently judging me.”

There was no response.

“If you just wanted to date… Then why didn’t you say so?” Truth be told, I always thought Alan was kinda cute, but I never thought he was interested in me.

Several moments passed before Alan replied. “Is it too late to ask now?”

I smiled. “No, it’s not.”

“Can you help me with the table?” I heard Alan’s voice coming from the hall.

It was now three years after that fateful weekend by the lake when Alan opened his feelings to me. We started dating and he underwent the procedure to become a crotchhead two weeks later.

As I was nearing the end of my studies, we decided to stay in crotchhead town and rent an apartment, which we were now furnishing.

“I’m coming!” I said as I made my way over to the hall.

I saw Alan who had the package with the table inside, at his feet.

“This is the one for the living room,” he said as if that wasn’t obvious given the size of it.

Both of us picked one side of the package and carefully made our way to the living room where we placed it on the spot where the table would be standing later.

Alan let himself fall onto the couch, which we had already set up. While I had been painting the kitchen, Alan had been carrying most of the boxes around, so he was understandably exhausted.

I sat down next to him. “And here I thought crotchhead tables would be lighter.”

Alan laughed. “Well most of the weight is the tabletop itself.”

I looked him in the eyes and enjoyed the moment. Then I leaned over to give him a quick kiss.

Apparently he wasn’t satisfied and leaned over himself and gave me a longer kiss until I tasted something salty in my mouth.

Alan must have noticed my surprise and broke the kiss, smirking at me.

I smiled back. Looked like Alan wasn’t too exhausted to have some fun. I got up and positioned myself on his lap, locking our lips.

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